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  • Writer's pictureTLALOCO

You Only Got Game, When You're Gamey!

Updated: Mar 24

Skunks have never gotten a break when it comes to reputation.They are the most well-known smelly creatures on earth.


Yet, ranking the ten most smelliest animals in the world, they are a distant last! Which is hard to believe, if you've ever been around one.


They stink, but are cute little creatures nonetheless. More so, if you're a skunk. Come to think of it, we've all known a few skunks in our lives.


You recall Warner Bros cartoon Pepe Le Pew? He was the "ladies man," of all the cats. A skunk that was literally the "Cats Meow!"


Isn't it ironic that a Skunk would be cast as the attractive rogue in a cartoon? Not really.


In fact, in real life, Skunks are lovely creatures among other skunks that find their smell erotically attractive. Which is why they have thrived in nature and not landed on some endangered species list. They reproduce happily in the stink of the moment...just like us!


Sure their toxic spray is meant as a defense mechanism to ward off predators and humans. But among their own kind, well...they passed the smell test. You see, all animals have a recognizable smell. Even you...and everyone knows that you stink!


In fact, we all stink! De veras (really), we just won't admit it. What's worse, we all spread our scent to others on a daily basis. The sense of smell, or olfaction, is the special sense through which smells are perceived.


What do you smell on your Mama after she makes a grand meal? Or your father, when he comes in from working on the car. Or you, after you just mowed the lawn. Or when your sister or you, have been out all night with a main squeeze, Cochinos!


The sense of smell has many functions, including detecting desirable foods, avoiding hazards, and pheromones (more on this later) that plays a role in taste, and attraction.


Predators use a combination of sensors; vision, hearing, and smell to find their next meal. But smell is a primary cause that cues the hunt and ultimate kill of their prey. Which is why the lion isn't giving the pig a hickey! It just smells delish!


But not all animals are considered a tasty meal. Lions generally avoid humans unless they are directly threatened or smell fear. Yes, science has determined fear has a smell. And meat-eaters know it well.


Recent studies have demonstrated that the human brain responds to fear signals hidden within the body odor cocktail. The smells sensors are able to extract specific signals, and processes body odors differently than other perceptually similar odors. So Man-Up or Woman-Up in stressful situations before you become a smelly victim!


Humans have a distinct smell that can ward off potential danger and in some cases invite it. You see, our human smell has a unique odor signature that carries information related to our genetic makeup, as well as information about personal environmental variables, such as diet and hygiene.


Yeah, that daily cocktail mix of shampoo, detergents, soaps, colognes, hair gel, deodorants, lotions and perfumes — are meant to attract or showcase ourselves.


That stuff isn't really masking what nature knows about you. You always smell like a human to other animals.


You see, all animal species carry scents that are unique to that animal. We are no different.


Except, we are the only ones trying to mask our body odors with Calvin Klein Eternity for Men and Curve by Liz Claiborne.


Humans smell, human to most wildlife — without fur, and with our sweat glands oozing at the surface, we’re a pretty stinky, or at least, a stunningly recognizable, creature. The relatively small differences between us (our soap choices, laundry detergent preferences and diets) probably aren’t super important or relevant in the animal world.


Those additional smells are just odors sputtering around the one important smell signal (pheromones) oozing from every pore — which is that we are human — and therefore indicating it’s time for that animal to run or hide. A pheromone is a secreted or excreted chemical factor through sweat, urine, semen, breast milk, feces, and vaginal fluids that triggers a behavioral response in members of the same species.


Si, our natural odors are genetically driven to attract our own species - we're suppose to smell! The one exception is the creature that evolved to feed specifically on us.


For example, a few mosquito species feed only on human blood. They don’t like deer, dogs or cows. Just people. Apparently, they’re drawn in by our odor. But, that's not the only reason.


Most mosquitoes are anautogenous, meaning, females require a blood meal to reproduce. The volume and quality of the blood meal can play an important role in egg production.


When a female mosquito feeds on animal blood, they lay fewer eggs than after feeding on the blood of a human.


Yeah, that's right, we humans are the reason mosquitos are happy in the ecological system and hungrily drawn to us.


Most mosquitos feed on any blood, but among humans, especially Type "O." How do they know your blood type? Pues, what have we been discussing ese? The mosquito's can smell you, pendejo!


That's right, since blood type antigens can be found in the sweat, saliva and tears oozing from us.


Mosquitoes can sense these antigens as they approach a person. The Type "O" person is just one big dessert to a hungry mosquito.


Unlike Moscas (flies), which are attracted to shitty people!


Niels Verhulst, a researcher at the University of Zurich’s Institute of Parasitology, said it is the makeup and composition of the bacterial species we harbor on our skin that give us our odor.


Some of that is determined by genetics, some from the products we use on our skin, and some from our diet. “But how important these different parts are? That is something that we do not know yet,” he said. However, he noted that there is a positive correlation between drinking beer and one’s attractiveness to mosquitoes.


And, if you thought drinking beer was a sure-fire way to attract attention, you got that right for all the wrong reasons. So splash on the Old Spice or Chanel and get busy

swatting back the night club Play-yas and the bugs...cause they will find you. The nose, knows!


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